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Five Strains For King Charles III’s Coronation

What are the top five strains for watching King Charles III’s coronation? Millions worldwide will be tuning in to see some old guy declared King.

As is tradition, the coronation will be held at Westminster Abbey on May 6. Charles and Camilla will be crowned King and Queen Consort. Charles will be the 40th reigning monarch since 1066.

If you enjoy these traditions and customs that date back over 1,000 years, why not enjoy another centuries-old tradition?

Light up that joint, bowl, bong, or however you consume cannabis. Here are the top five strains for watching King Charles III’s coronation.

Five Strains For King Charles III’s Coronation

5 – Girl Scout Cookies 

Five Strains For King Charles III's Coronation

This strain needs no introduction. If you’re the type that likes to watch the lifestyles of the rich and famous, then GSC is the perfect strain for watching the coronation. From its sweet flavour to its high THC content, GSC is the ideal companion buddy to your Saturday morning coronation-watching.

Just remember to be a responsible consumer: stock up on munchies before the show starts. GSC will have you reaching for actual cookies.

4- Sour Diesel 

Sour Diesel is among the best strains for watching King Charles III’s coronation simply because the coronation is boring. While we recommend GSC for the Monarch lovers, the rest of us may have significant others that insist we watch it with them.

Others are interested in self-flagellation.

Whatever your reasons, if you find yourself nodding off during the Procession, hit that Sour Diesel and ask yourself why ole’ Chuck and Camilla are in the Diamond Jubilee State Coach instead of the Gold State Coach as is tradition (and how did you know that? Man, this sour Diesel is some good shit).

3 – Purple Haze 

Strains For Coronation

At one point during the coronation, you will want the Purple Haze strain for when they bust out Orbs and Sceptres from the 1600s.

Whatever you think of the British monarchy – or monarchy in general – you’ll want some visual stimulus before focusing on these golden rods and spheres.

Purple Haze provides just the right amount of brightness, contrast, and saturation to your visual output. When the gold of the Sovereign’s orb glistens off the camera lights, you’ll be glad you partook.

Five Strains For King Charles III’s Coronation

2 – ChemDog

If you’re like me, sitting through King Charles’ coronation sounds as appealing as sitting through a presidential inauguration. Purple Haze or Sour Diesel would serve no purpose. If anything, they’d make me aware of how boring the entire event is.

Hence, my top strain for the coronation is Chemdog.

A potent hybrid recommended for connoisseurs only, this strain will put the coronation in an entirely new light. Physically — in a new light, like with Sour Diesel, those orbs and sceptres will look pretty cool.

But also mentally. When you consume Chemdog, you can feel your brain forming new neural pathways of thought and understanding.

Take the British monarch, for example. The institution has existed since 1066. That’s a long time. But it makes sense.

Monarchs have long-term perspectives. They don’t have to listen to polls or cater to voters. Their interest is in the long-term health and prosperity of the country rather than the short-term gains that dominate the thinking of democratic politicians.

Monarchy vs. Democracy

Monarchy vs Democracy
“Democracy has nothing to do with freedom. Democracy is a soft variant of communism, and rarely in the history of ideas has it been taken for anything else.” – Hoppe

Monarchs see the country as their own private property. Therefore, they have a personal interest in maintaining the rule of law.

The good ones want individual rights since their monarchy benefits from a stable and prosperous economy.

Likewise, subjects of a monarchy see a military draft or higher taxes for what they are: kidnapping and theft. As opposed to the democratic propaganda of sacrificing yourself and your family’s prosperity for the “good of society.”

In a democracy, politicians are short-term caretakers willing to sacrifice individual rights, freedoms, and the nation’s long-term stability to win a few votes or please special interest groups.

A democratic politician can enter office, run up the deficit, start a war, make life worse for the average person, and then leave with a fat pension and a corporate press who will praise them — at your expense.

And I’m supposed to worship democracy and hate monarchy; why?

Thanks, ChemDog. You are the ideal strain for watching the coronation.

Five Strains For King Charles III’s Coronation

1 – White Widow 

best strain for watching King Charles III's coronation is White Widow

By far, the best strain for watching King Charles III’s coronation is White Widow.

White Widow, of course, needs no introduction. A balanced hybrid that crosses a Brazilian sativa with a South Indian indica, this is the strain of the famous Dutch coffee shops.

But it’s also an excellent strain for watching the coronation. Almost immediately after smoking or vaping, you feel an energy that’ll get you off the couch and cleaning your house.

Which is why we recommend it for the coronation. Whether you love the coronation, hate it, or are indifferent to it, combining a leisurely activity with something active is always beneficial.

So, with a bit of White Widow, you can enjoy the coronation while getting something done around the house, like cleaning or organizing.

Or if you’re British and still need to file a tax return, the coronation plus some White Widow provides an excellent opportunity. 

Somebody’s got to pay for this investiture.

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